He Put the Honey In Honeymoon

I met Michael on September 10, 1982. I was 19 years old and a sophomore in college. I was immediately taken with this boy, but had no idea why or where it would eventually lead.
All I knew was that he was adorable and something behind his eyes said he was a really good guy.

Michael and I dated off and on for years before deciding we were better off as friends. He has been one of my very best friends ever since.
We went our separate ways only to end up back together years later. We like to think of ourselves as late bloomers.

After being a single mother for 7 years and Danny being gone for 3 years Michael proposed on September 10, 2000.

Michael, the kids, and me all got married on the most perfect day in June in 2001. It was 76 degrees and sunny. We felt like we were being blessed from all sides. Our reception was in the back yard of the house we had bought together. It was truly one of the best days of my life. I am not a wedding girl. I had not wanted my original big wedding, so the idea of doing it again didn't thrill me. But Michael had never been married and his family wanted to be there. For him I would have walked through a ring of fire if that is what it took. Luckily, my requirements were considerably less. After all was said and done it was time for us to go on our honeymoon. The idea of just the two of us being away for 2 whole weeks sounded like pure bliss. We had chosen to start our extended vacation at the Poconos. We wanted something traditionally honeymoon like that we could drive to. We had to rent a car only days before we left because both of our vehicles had broken down. There were many catastrophic events surrounding our big day and the honeymoon was our chance to escape, if only for a while.

When we originally got to our room it had a deck facing a stagnant pond filled to the brim with mangy looking ducks and the interior decor hadn't been touched since 1975. There were no outside activities and the whole place looked forgotten. We unpacked, tired from the long drive and sat at a table full of other recently married couples. Michael and I were slap happy at that point. Everything had become hysterically funny. We had tried to engage the others in conversation to no avail. They all looked like they had just come from a funeral procession. The harder we tried to be friendly, the more it made us laugh that we were being ignored. We could barely contain ourselves. The other couples ate as fast as they could to get away from us which made us laugh even harder. At one point we both had to work at keeping the food and drink from spraying out of our mouths, we were guffawing so hard.

Our room was really bad in every way imaginable. It didn't look anything like the brochure and Michael started to feel like he was letting me down. I just laughed and said we would be fine no matter where we were. I was happy just to have him all to myself. We could have been in a tent for all I cared. Well that's not entirely true-he would have loved the camping idea but I wanted something a little more refined.

Waking up we headed out to the deck with our coffee and the smell from all the duck poop nearly knocked us out. Sputtering and gagging we went in to grab a bite to eat. Michael braved the outside one more time only to be surrounded by very brazen ducks who did not take no for an answer. He began backing up into the room as they swarmed him for the cracker he held in his hand. Slamming the door shut and locking it behind him he gasped, "I almost didn't make it! I had to throw half the box at them just so they would let me pass." That was the last straw for us.

We went to another resort in the same chain to water ski to get away from the honeymoon from hell. As we walked into the lobby we were certain we heard a choir of angels as we entered. This resort was everything ours was not. It had a beautiful wooden walls surrounded by trees with a lovely lake as their view. They had tennis courts, a driving range and water skiing. They had interior decoration that was peaceful, beautiful and new. A young girl who worked there began talking to us. She said the most magical thing. "Do you want to move over to this resort? It would only take a couple minutes to transfer your reservation and you can go get your things." Michael and I bolted so fast out there to get our stuff that only a blur of where we were standing could be seen.

A half hour later we were settle d in our new resort cabin. We felt so lucky the wonderful girl offered an escape from our Pocono prison camp. We loved our new resort and participated in everything. We even went rollerblading in the gym where Michael tried to "crack the whip" with me and only succeeded in cracking me in the face and cracking his behind after he fell. We did not go skating again after that.

This picture was my idea, of course.Michael, although a great guy, is still a guy. "Awe geeze Kel, those pictures are so cheesy."
" I know, but we are in the cheese capital of the world. If we don't do it, I will always regret it. C'mon, let's do it. It will be fun. Why go all the way to the Poconos and try to play it straight. When in Rome..." I began to beg my new husband. "OK, let's do it. I'm only doing it for you."Michael conceded, concerned about feeling completely stupid in a tub, in front of a total stranger.

We did have fun taking those pictures. We even have one really goofy picture where they super imposed us in a brandy snifter. Personally, it's my favorite. We keep the photo album of that week in our bedroom with the heart shaped tub picture front and center. Michael now likes our pictures as we laugh about killer ducks, seedy hotels and bathing in front of strangers.