"The Times They Are A Changin'"

I have been listening to Bob Dylan, who I must admit has never been one of my all time favorites. I have always liked his lyrics, but I was never crazy about his voice, until now.
Things in my life are shifting, changing shape and I am required to try and at least keep up. I have had a lot of things change suddenly on me, so this is not a new feeling, but it's not a comforting one either. Change is hard. I realize this is neither prophetic or profound. We all know that change of any kind is tough to deal with. I am not an exception to any big life rule, especially this one. The one thing I have going for me is the ability to hang on. I am an expert on seeing things in the distance travelling towards me and getting a firm grip on myself, knowing that I need to hold on tight. It is the gift that keeps on giving. I am in the throws of that kind of life change.
I am the first one to admit that I am not my house, my job, my income or my social status. Having never had much of a status or income helps drive that point home for me. My house, well that is another story.
Back in 1994 I walked out of the house I owned with Danny in order for us to straighten out the mess that had become our marriage. I moved into an apartment, squeezing the 4 kids and I into a cramped, but peaceful space. I didn't know it at the time, but I would never move back to the house I helped Danny build for our family.
I bought my own house after our divorce, but a mere mile away from Danny's house. He stayed in the house he and I shared and we shared custody of our kids. His parents lived maybe a 1/2 mile away and the situation worked really well until the day he died.
Eight years ago I put the house I bought for myself and my kids up for sale in order to buy a house that Michael and I could start our lives together in. I was hesitant to do it, but knew in the end it was all for the best. My house was old and needed work and Michael wanted to spend time with me and the kids, not do house repair with his extra time. Fair enough, I thought, so I moved to a newer house with the love of my life to begin our lives as husband and wife. We had our wedding reception at our new home. We carefully and lovingly made our house our home with the intention that we would be there for years to come. I pictured myself rocking my grandchildren on a rocker on the back porch.
2001 brought a terrorist attack that would change the airline industry forever. It was only months after Michael and I had gotten married. For a few years after that we watched his company try and come back from the terrible ordeal. Rumors were flying that things would be closing and people would either be laid off or have pay cuts. In 2004 we decided to start really looking hard at our options. It had never been in the plan to move to the corporate headquarters in Houston, but it became more and more apparent that it might be what was best for Michael and the career he has had for the last 25 years.
Michael and I worried about the kids. My children have had to move more than their fair share, although I will admit there are plenty of other kids who have had it much worse. Painfully, we told the kids about the new house we would be moving into. The upside was they for the first time would all be getting their very own rooms. The downside, of course, was that it was 1,200 miles away from everything and everybody they have ever known. We made the trek to Houston and settled in. We painted, replaced and fixed, so that our house would soon become our home. We have lived in our beloved home for five years and we love where we live. Michael, the kids and I have put our blood, sweat and tears into this home, just like we have every other house we have ever lived in.
The kids are growing up and out at this point in our lives. Michael and I sit in our big nearly empty house and listen to the silence that now surrounds us. Things have once again shifted in another direction. Mike and I feel torn about trying to keep a house that we clearly don't need anymore. Part of us wants to stay and enjoy the fruits of our labors. Part of us wants to move on to the home we will retire into, with less to clean and keep up.
After many heartfelt discussions we have opted to downsize. I never picture myself moving out the houses I own. Not once have I bought a house with the idea I wouldn't be staying and yet I find myself time and time again packing boxes and memories getting ready to move my heart and my family to another place.
Right now Michael and I have heavy hearts about leaving another house we worked so hard on to become our home. We love our neighbors, like we always have, and wonder what it will feel like to pass the house when someone else takes ownership of it. I don't imagine I'll drive down our street anytime too soon after we move.
The optimist in me is already on the hunt for the next big adventure in home ownership. I dig real estate and am scouting neighborhoods that will suit our new purpose. I am not at all looking forward to the physical move and saying goodbye to the house we moved across the country into. It is the house where we all grew up, the kids and Michael and me. But time has moved on and now we should at least try and keep up.
Bob Dylan's song "The Times They Are a Changin'" fits this time in my life perfectly. I thought I would share some of the lyrics so you could see why.
"Come gather round people
Wherever you roam
And admit that the waters
Around you have grown
And accept it that soon
You'll be drenched to the bone
If your time to you
Is worth savin'
Then you better start swimmin'
Or you'll sink like a stone
For the times they are a changin'."